Shelter? More like Shitter.

I WANT TWO HOURS OF MY LIFE BACK, YOU BASTARDS! YOU STINKING, PUS-FILLED SORES ON THE DEVIL'S BOTTOM!

*Rant, seethe*

Right, the reason for this outburst? "Shelter", Julian Moore's new disaster movie. It is supposedly a supernatural thriller, but trust me, it is an utter disaster.

I am still trying to work out what the premise of the film actually is, being as it changed its mind every 30 seconds. The overall message I came away with was that if you get the flu jab for your children, you are a demon and deserve to burn in hell. I kid you not, this was actually the theme of the film. I don't want to ruin it for you, but the directors (yes, two) have already done this for you, so I won't lose any sleep.

If they had handed out right-wing religious pamphlets with the popcorn, I don't think I would actually have been all that surprised. Basically, it is a pile of fundamental bollocks.

I am really disappointed in Julian Moore for signing up to this, she could do so much better. As a woman who is a supposedly a pro-life activist, I have to admit to being rather surprised that she didn't just chuck this script back into the dung heap from whence it came. This film was so bad half the audience got up and walked out. I will hand it to us Brits - we can tolerate a lot of crap (we are the country of origin for programmes such as 'Deal or No Deal' after all), but we will not be lectured to by a bunch of religious nutcases as we are trying to watch a film apparently made for our entertainment.

As a bumper sticker once said, "Don't pray in my school, and I won't think in your church". In this case, "don't preach in my theatre, and I'll leave you be on my blog".

Damn right.

Don't get me wrong, I don't care either way about people's religious beliefs, that is their bag. I do, however, vociferously resent having it shoved down my throat on the pretext that I am watching a supernatural thriller. I PAID for this, that is what pisses me off the most. If I wanted to pay for two hours of religious crap, I'd donate to a gospel channel, I do not expect it to be doled out to me at my local multiplex.

Shelter - the shittest movie I have seen in a long, long time.